It’s been at least 30 years since the photocopied list of “church bloopers” made the rounds. These lists claimed that all the items were excerpts from actual church bulletins.

Here are a few reminders:

— Remember in prayer the many who are sick and tired of our church and community.

— During the absence of our pastor we enjoyed the rare privilege of hearing a good sermon when A.B. Doe supplied our pulpit.

— A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.

— At the evening service tonight the sermon topic will be “What is Hell?” Come early and listen to our choir practice.

— The Rev. Adams spoke briefly, much to the delight of his audience.

— The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind. They can be seen in the church basement Saturday.

— For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

— Thursday night: Potluck supper. Prayer and medication to follow.

Some folks don’t find much humor in religion. I do and I enjoyed a good laugh over these church bloopers.

As a teenager I knew a couple of old guys who didn’t appreciate humor in our church. After a Sunday morning service, I recall, I was sharing a joke with my friends in the narthex. (I don’t remember the joke but I do remember it was clean. I wasn’t a genius but I wasn’t stupid either.) As we teenagers enjoyed a hearty laugh, one of the older gentlemen shook his finger in my face and scolded, “Young man, the way you talk in church!”

There are boundaries, of course. The Dutch and Low German languages have a word for one of those boundaries — “spot.” (The “o” is pronounced like a cross between the “o” in hot and the “u” in pudding.) Years ago, in Dutch Reformed Church communities, folks who got a bit too light-hearted about spiritual things were warned against committing “spotten,” or making a mockery of such matters. “Spot,” as I understand it, is one step away from blasphemy.

Keeping “spot” in view, I think our churches should be filled with smiling faces rather than the dour mugs seen in some pews. A valid faith, after all, should produce much to rejoice about. Besides, many amusing things happen in church.

As a young teenager, my mother sometimes gave me charge of my baby sister during a Sunday evening church service. One night, the tow-headed toddler escaped my grasp and sprinted to the front of the church where she sat down at the piano and began to pound on the keys. Red faced, I retrieved her while the congregation enjoyed a good laugh.

At our church in Sioux City, a children’s sermon was a part of the worship service. The pastor called the younger children to the front of the church where they would gather around him as he shared an easy-to-understand lesson.

In one such exercise the pastor encouraged the children to honor their parents by, among other things, helping around the house. “Perhaps you can help your mother do the dishes,” he suggested.

“My mother never does the dishes,” piped up one small boy. His mother, who maintained an immaculate home, slid down in her pew while the congregation rocked with laughter.

More than a few of us had to stifle a chuckle one Sunday morning when a guest minister apparently failed to remember he was wearing a lavaliere microphone. While seated at the back of the chancel during the offering he blew his nose. Leaning forward, he gave a vigorous blow directly into the microphone. The raucous noise was amplified through the church’s public address system, rattling the speakers and tickling many ears, including my young children who couldn’t control their laughter.

None of these are as humorous, however, as an anecdote shared recently by a friend. During a worship service a few months ago his three-year-old son looked up at him and loudly proclaimed for all to hear, “Daddy, you have a booger in your nose!”

“Angels can fly,” G. K. Chesterton wrote, “because they take themselves lightly.”

No “spotten” intended.

Arvid Huisman can be contacted at huismaniowa@gmail.com. ©2024 by Huisman Communications.